im that one friend that doesnt date anyone and doesnt really go to parties or have a life really but when im over at your house ill eat all your food and for exchange i shall tell you bad puns

(Source: dont-argue-with-your-serperior, via tempestpaige)

I have bullshitted my way through almost two decades of life

(Source: whorville, via grizzlybearzz)

hey … so,.. uhh… (looks at notecards) did you uh did …you fall out of heaven because um (drops cards) shit fuck oh god fuck im so sorry  youre-youre just s o.pretty i m soryr

(Source: arkhams, via randomsparadise)